naamah_darling: Glass of tawny port on a table branded with a seven-pointed star. (Port Wine and the Morning Star)
The disability thing: I'm not getting as much money as I think I should be, but I'm getting an amount we can maybe work with, and possibly increase.  I still don't really want to talk about it or hear horror stories or even hear "It'll be really hard but eventually they'll give you what you want."  I honestly don't have the energy for "really hard" right now.  Even "moderately difficult" makes me want to throw myself out of the chariot and dash my head against a rock, so hearing that it will eventually be okay is really really not reassuring.  I just want to say that I'm . . . 65% okay with it.  It's just made thinking about anything else really hard, which means my ability to do necessary things has suffered.

But I'm improved.  Much less upset.  Might have something to do with the fact that I misheard or misremembered what Sargon said, and so for two whole days I was walking around thinking I was getting HALF what I am actually getting.  Might account for me being kind of a mess.

Smut: We're releasing the Golden Mask ebook next week on Amazon and on Smashwords.  We'll let you know when that happens.  Right now I'm doing the formatting for the print books, and I have to say, I'm not a fan of the process.

Really Bad Smut: Since I started this experiment on the 14th, I've sold around 80 copies of my horrible short story bundles.  At a profit around $0.30 - $0.35, that's, like, a little under $30.  So, not much monetarily, but sales are pretty good.  Debating whether to continue the experiment, but I think I should really give it a few more months of adding new stuff every week, and see how that goes.
naamah_darling: The right-side canines of a wolf's skull; the upper canine is made of gold. (Default)
CRAZINESS UPDATE:

Oh, my god. Whoa, the mood swings today!

See, I am laughing about it right now. Like, seriously. This is hilarious. But an hour ago I wanted to stick my head in a bucket of dead possum because that might have cheered me up a little.

Being a complete fuckup almost becomes reassuring after a while. You stop worrying you might be crazy, and settle comfortably into knowing that you are. Then you can get on with things without trying to pretend to be something you aren't, and just work with what you have.

I slept really badly last night. I kept waking up, energized, mind ready with all kinds of interesting stuff -- interesting stuff that does not include things I SHOULD be thinking about, which was extra frustrating, because I wasn't even getting any WORK done.

Got that appointment with Social Security on the 12th, and am trying not to freak out. I want it to be NOW because I want to know NOW.

ANYWAY. ETSY ORDERS.

Still some bookmarks left, still offering gift boxes with 'em.

I have all the orders but one packed up, and will mail them today or tomorrow. Thank you to everyone, from me and from the furry little jerkbrain who is sitting on my windowsill staring at, as near as I can tell, wind. I just had to wait for the money to hit the bank.

IN OTHER NEWS.

Saw The Hobbit and was largely unimpressed by the movie itself, though the visuals were, in places, amazing, and Martin Freeman was brilliant as Bilbo. Obligatory reference to Richard Armitage's smoldering performance as Mister Dwarftember. Obligatory declaration of eagerness to see more of Smaug. Obligatory pointing to giant eagles while gesticulating madly. Obligatory reference to Cate Blanchett's undying, everlasting, astonishing wonderfulness. I don't go for regal all that much, but holy shit, as Galadriel, I would fling myself at her feet and worship her for eternity just to have her smile at me. Like, it's not even primarily sexual. I just want her kindness and benevolent regard, and that would be enough.

Gaming, playing a new character -- Tor, half-Barsoomian teenage space pirate -- who is . . . an absolutely horrible person. Only two of my other head-people would be willing to have him around as a friend, and that speaks poorly of him. Eve and Xander are both horrible people, too. It's been enormously therapeutic to play someone with many fucks to give, yet who deliberately chooses to give not a single one of them. Spending time in his headspace is like . . . not giving a shit about anything, ever. Probably bad for me, given that he's hair-trigger, fairly cruel, trollish, and utterly without scruples ("What the hell are scruples? Pig entrails? Can you eat them? No? Get the fuck out, then, and take your fucking scruples with you.") but delightfully liberating. He's not really afraid of anything.

I'm very tired. I'm going to go pick up my prescription and then rest for a while.
naamah_darling: Picture of a treasure chest with a skull and crossbones on top. My art! (Artistic)
Working on another Jetan set, and will be selling one of the two.  I thought I'd be selling this one, but it's coming out nicer than the other, so I may keep it and sell the first.  Except I have fondness for the first one, because first.  Also, this second one is a bit more complicated.  The pieces don't fit along the back in one perfect row, I had to stack them, and build a little box inside the box to hold them.  I'm not sure it'd stand up to much playing with.  I just don't know!  I may enlist y'all's help to decide.

We're $23 from 80% on the Queen of the Sky Frontier campaign, and I expect the materials for the bookmarks to start arriving any day now.  That'll be nice!  I'm looking forward to relaxing with some jewelry stuff!

We got the books for the Pride and Prostitutes print campaign in today.  There was a whole Dramatic Episode where Createspace were being pretty stupid, but we got it fixed.  You can read the saga here, if you like; Sargon wrote it up.  We're stuck with them for now, because I don't have the know-how or the software to do the print formatting myself, or the spoons to deal with learning the software, or the money to buy it, or the spoons or desire to mess with getting my computer to run it.  I am too goddamn tired.  But the books are here!  They look good!  And as soon as we figure out how best to mail them, they will go out.

I've been writing, very slowly but steadily.  Vengeance and Valor is done, and I'm eleven chapters into book 2, Frontiers and Fables.  I won't be publishing it in any form until the whole thing is done, because the plot is so complicated and there's so much backstory I am going to have to be able to go back and edit right up until the last pass is done to make sure there are no loose ends I didn't intend to remain loose, and all my facts are straight.  I'm really excited about it still, and it will be finished eventually; hopefully sooner rather than later, although what "sooner" means is anyone's guess.  For now, I just like spending time with my characters.  When it's going well, there's nothing more fulfilling than writing.  Sadly, being bipolar kind of undercuts the regularity of it all.

On that front, things are middle of the road.  Considering how bad they have been in the not too distant past, that is an improvement.  I am frustrated, and scared, and desperately hoping to hear back from the social security people soon, so I can get to work on my appeal.  (They'll deny me this time.  I'm certain of it.)  I think having a greater degree of financial stability would help immensely.  It wouldn't make me able to do more, but it would make the nothing I am often able to a lot less painful, I think.  I don't have hope.  I'm tired.  I wish I were living a different life.  Desperately.  But this is what I have, and I'm having to stick with it.

I don't have a whole lot more to say, I'm just . . . lonely.  And tired of not talking.
naamah_darling: Picture of a treasure chest with a skull and crossbones on top. My art! (Artistic)
The Golden Mask has started, and the serial has just finished its first week. There's three chapters for your perusal, now. Go take a look! It is seriously the coolest, and you will love it. I'm completely in love with it. I'll try to post regular updates about this one. I've been slacking off too much on that because I've been so damn tired, and I feel awful about that.

Speaking of which, I am tired like it is a full-time job. I've been feeling better overall, but the past month has been exhausting, and I underestimated how long it would take to recover. I want to do something entertaining this weekend, but Jesus, I am too tired to seriously contemplate anything that requires leaving the house or being sociable. I am hoping to feel well enough to go to the writers' meeting tomorrow, or at least hang with friends, but I don't know.

If you have contacted me about something, or I agreed to do paid work for you: please remind me what you needed me to do. I've got a couple things going for Amber, and another bondage pony for an undisclosed recipient, and if there is anything else, let me know. My brain is like a sieve.

I've got Halloween ponies to take pictures of and post pictures of. They're seriously adorable, but I haven't had the energy to take pics yet. I'll probably do that tomorrow. Thrilling. But I get to play with tiny pumpkins, so it's all good.

I am nearly done with a winter-themed baby pony who will, if all goes well, have fairy wings. I've made the wings already, my first attempt, and they aren't bad at all. Not what I was aiming for but still really pretty. I just have to install them. I don't think I'll foul it up, but never say never. I am ready to do it over if I have to. I'm happy learning.

I finished the formatting for Fox's Tale, which means it will be an ebook super-soon. I added a super-sweet and adorable bonus scene that also has lots of sex in it, so if you wanted your Valbrand/Taon/Shennar three-way, well, I made you something cute.

I've plotted out most of the rest of the second Vengeance and Valor book in broad details, and made sketchy jabs at the final book, and will start work on Frontiers and Fables as soon as I clear enough of the other stuff off my table to be able to spend the time on it. There is going to be so much awesome shit in this next book, seriously. Here's where it becomes an adventure. I want it finished, because I want to know what happens, and that's the best motivation to work that I've found yet.

And that's about it for now. I have to sleep, because I have not done that yet today.
naamah_darling: The right-side canines of a wolf's skull; the upper canine is made of gold. (Default)
Awesome weekend spent watching bad movies and playing Scribblish with friends. That is seriously the most fun game ever. Like a cross between Pictionary and the kids' game of Telephone, only better than both of those by nine thousand percent.

Saw Thor, finally (this was not THE bad movie; that was The Howling 2: Your Sister Is A Werewolf, possibly the best bad movie I have ever seen). Anyway, Thor was fun, and absolutely beautiful to look at. Very stylish, very smooth, very pretty. And damn, Chris Hemsworth looked amazing in a very "just get naked already" way. I feel bad for Tom Hiddleston, who was acting his ass off and doing a really great job, playing the part so close to the vest.

There was a really good movie in there somewhere, and he was definitely in it, but it was cut all to hell and reassembled badly, and as a result the last third fell apart completely as far as, you know, making any sense goes. A director's cut will probably help, but -- call me a crazy Philistine -- I don't feel like I should have to wait for a director's cut to watch a movie that's plotted in such a way that it moves from point A to point B in a fashion both reasonably sane and not too predictable.

Still, both principals did a good job with their parts, and I suspect that Hiddleston is pretty brilliant under there, I've just never seen him in anything else. I will probably borrow Wallander from Bat_Cheva at some point.

On other fronts, I'm . . . I don't know. I've been working rather a lot, which is good, but it's all art stuff. Nothing wrong with that, but I really need to be writing. I hate that about my brain. I hate how it just decides to do one thing or the other or neither or both at once at complete random, and that no matter how good I get at figuring out what is happening or is about to happen, I still have very little control over it.

I am still having trouble with bonus content for Witches' Mark, which I hope to have done by the time I have the cover done, which will be very soon. Getting this one out in e-book form has been way slower than I would've liked, but I was really, really tired. Anyway, the bonus content is fighting me.

Anyone who has read the book and wants to volunteer to read over the bonus content once it's done, and possibly before that if I decide I need help figuring out what's wrong, sing out. It's Winter/Darius, and in places it's pretty intensely . . . disturbing (trigger warning: self-injury, mindfucking, teh gayz). I am very, very pleased with about half of it, and pissed off at the rest, which is like a cowlick that stubbornly refuses to behave.

Disclaimer

May. 24th, 2011 05:35 am
naamah_darling: The right-side canines of a wolf's skull; the upper canine is made of gold. (Bookish)
Uuuugh. Guys? I am way behind on answering comments and emails. Like, this is ridiculous. Please be patient with me, and if you really need something, go ahead and poke me. I truly won't mind. I'm just . . . not keeping up with shit at the moment. My apologies.

For the moment, have things that have been amusing me.

A truly beautiful entry by [livejournal.com profile] seanan_mcguire.

Clara Driscoll, not Louis Comfort Tiffany, was responsible for a great many of Tiffany's masterpieces. I think it is really, really important to publicize this sort of thing, and get the word out. Her story is hardly unique in the history of gifted women.

Silly looking cat fails to meow. Repeatedly.

Amber Benson on prostituting your creativity for fun and profit.

I was not a Roseanne fan, but this is a really interesting and in places amazing article about her experience working as a woman in Hollywood. Really good reading. And I really like the picture of her that they chose to go with it.

The Pervocracy, a blog I just found, still in its infancy and relatively unspoiled by hordes of commenters. I like it a lot. There are some jerks in comments here and there, as the blog is not yet popular enough to have a self-policing group of commenters. I really enjoyed her recent post about scenes and subspace, for one.

Domism: Role Essentialism and Sexism Intersectionality in the BDSM Scene, a really great article about BDSM roles and sexism.

Old Boingboing entry, featuring pictures of a set of piano/organ-maker's tools that are just breathtaking. A must-see. And the guy's name was Studley.

I've had this entry open in tabs since it was posted. Author [livejournal.com profile] lanerobins discusses scenes that are not working, and how she goes about figuring out what's wrong. I always like reading about this sort of thing. The process is so individual, so unique to each person, yet there is always something you can learn from them.

There. I've closed out tabs. Now I'm going to try to find something constructive to do. Maybe answer emails. Yeesh.

Disclaimer

May. 24th, 2011 05:35 am
naamah_darling: The right-side canines of a wolf's skull; the upper canine is made of gold. (Bookish)
Uuuugh. Guys? I am way behind on answering comments and emails. Like, this is ridiculous. Please be patient with me, and if you really need something, go ahead and poke me. I truly won't mind. I'm just . . . not keeping up with shit at the moment. My apologies.

For the moment, have things that have been amusing me.

A truly beautiful entry by [livejournal.com profile] seanan_mcguire.

Clara Driscoll, not Louis Comfort Tiffany, was responsible for a great many of Tiffany's masterpieces. I think it is really, really important to publicize this sort of thing, and get the word out. Her story is hardly unique in the history of gifted women.

Silly looking cat fails to meow. Repeatedly.

Amber Benson on prostituting your creativity for fun and profit.

I was not a Roseanne fan, but this is a really interesting and in places amazing article about her experience working as a woman in Hollywood. Really good reading. And I really like the picture of her that they chose to go with it.

The Pervocracy, a blog I just found, still in its infancy and relatively unspoiled by hordes of commenters. I like it a lot. There are some jerks in comments here and there, as the blog is not yet popular enough to have a self-policing group of commenters. I really enjoyed her recent post about scenes and subspace, for one.

Domism: Role Essentialism and Sexism Intersectionality in the BDSM Scene, a really great article about BDSM roles and sexism.

Old Boingboing entry, featuring pictures of a set of piano/organ-maker's tools that are just breathtaking. A must-see. And the guy's name was Studley.

I've had this entry open in tabs since it was posted. Author [livejournal.com profile] lanerobins discusses scenes that are not working, and how she goes about figuring out what's wrong. I always like reading about this sort of thing. The process is so individual, so unique to each person, yet there is always something you can learn from them.

There. I've closed out tabs. Now I'm going to try to find something constructive to do. Maybe answer emails. Yeesh.
naamah_darling: The right-side canines of a wolf's skull; the upper canine is made of gold. (Default)
Man. You know, being mentally ill gets really fucking old after a while. I hate this stupid inability to get shit done, I hate the shitty mood swings and the fact that I don't have insurance and can't get adequate care. I may stop going to my therapist for a while, because going once a month isn't really helpful; so much shit has happened lately I spend all my time recapping and venting emotionally that I don't get to the helpful part. And it's not cheap.

And still, still, there's no force on earth that I know of that can stop me from sometimes feeling like I'm just lazy and letting this mess up my life more than it has to because I'm lazy and enjoy not having to work as hard as other people.

That is fucked up, y'all. Seriously.

Finished a really, really difficult scene tonight. Should have been easy, it's a MFF three-way, but it's also sex magic, and I had to kind of work the rhythm of the ritual into the prose via point-of-view shifts, and I'm not entirely sure I accomplished what I meant to accomplish. I've been working on it for what, two weeks now? Feels like longer. I will send it to the porn doctor tomorrow, and see if Sargon can render a second opinion.

Collaboration is proving to be pretty excellent. I never thought it was something I'd wind up doing, but this is working out really well. I'm a little distressed that I've been letting him handle as much of the non-sex writing as I have been, it feels a bit like having my project being taken out of my hands, but so far it's worked, and any time it seems off, I can fix it pretty easily. And I have to admit, I think the results have been pretty remarkable so far. I have a better grasp on some of the characters than he does, and he has a better grasp on others, so it works out nicely.

We're going to be done with this project soon, and we're casting about for what to do next. So many possibilities!

I want this to work, this crazy, stupid experiment of ours. I want this so bad. If we can make this work, it will be so seriously cool. If we can't, I have no idea what we're going to do. Go into selling fake religious relics? Or is that illegal now?

Now I am going to sleep, because I finally feel like I have accomplished something for the first time in a couple of weeks. I hope to have awesome dreams, and not crappy, sad ones like I've been having. Can't say I am a fan of dreaming about turning my deceased pet into a handbag and using it to store all my most precious memories and/or pirate treasure. I was okay with it in the dream, but once I woke up, I was kind of squicked out. I meant well, but that doesn't really amount to much. "I dreamed about skinning you out for luggage, but I meant it in the best possible way!"

I'm going to hope for the James Purefoy/Jason Isaacs bad daddy tag team. Knowing they are good friends IRL? Yeah, that's on the list of shit I didn't need to know, because it causes me serious lust-anguish. (There's probably a German word for that. German is awesome that way.) I will settle for oral sex from Steven Strait. Or on Steven Strait. Not really picky about that one.

As [livejournal.com profile] bat_cheva says, "Purr, purr."
naamah_darling: The right-side canines of a wolf's skull; the upper canine is made of gold. (Default)
Man. You know, being mentally ill gets really fucking old after a while. I hate this stupid inability to get shit done, I hate the shitty mood swings and the fact that I don't have insurance and can't get adequate care. I may stop going to my therapist for a while, because going once a month isn't really helpful; so much shit has happened lately I spend all my time recapping and venting emotionally that I don't get to the helpful part. And it's not cheap.

And still, still, there's no force on earth that I know of that can stop me from sometimes feeling like I'm just lazy and letting this mess up my life more than it has to because I'm lazy and enjoy not having to work as hard as other people.

That is fucked up, y'all. Seriously.

Finished a really, really difficult scene tonight. Should have been easy, it's a MFF three-way, but it's also sex magic, and I had to kind of work the rhythm of the ritual into the prose via point-of-view shifts, and I'm not entirely sure I accomplished what I meant to accomplish. I've been working on it for what, two weeks now? Feels like longer. I will send it to the porn doctor tomorrow, and see if Sargon can render a second opinion.

Collaboration is proving to be pretty excellent. I never thought it was something I'd wind up doing, but this is working out really well. I'm a little distressed that I've been letting him handle as much of the non-sex writing as I have been, it feels a bit like having my project being taken out of my hands, but so far it's worked, and any time it seems off, I can fix it pretty easily. And I have to admit, I think the results have been pretty remarkable so far. I have a better grasp on some of the characters than he does, and he has a better grasp on others, so it works out nicely.

We're going to be done with this project soon, and we're casting about for what to do next. So many possibilities!

I want this to work, this crazy, stupid experiment of ours. I want this so bad. If we can make this work, it will be so seriously cool. If we can't, I have no idea what we're going to do. Go into selling fake religious relics? Or is that illegal now?

Now I am going to sleep, because I finally feel like I have accomplished something for the first time in a couple of weeks. I hope to have awesome dreams, and not crappy, sad ones like I've been having. Can't say I am a fan of dreaming about turning my deceased pet into a handbag and using it to store all my most precious memories and/or pirate treasure. I was okay with it in the dream, but once I woke up, I was kind of squicked out. I meant well, but that doesn't really amount to much. "I dreamed about skinning you out for luggage, but I meant it in the best possible way!"

I'm going to hope for the James Purefoy/Jason Isaacs bad daddy tag team. Knowing they are good friends IRL? Yeah, that's on the list of shit I didn't need to know, because it causes me serious lust-anguish. (There's probably a German word for that. German is awesome that way.) I will settle for oral sex from Steven Strait. Or on Steven Strait. Not really picky about that one.

As [livejournal.com profile] bat_cheva says, "Purr, purr."
naamah_darling: The right-side canines of a wolf's skull; the upper canine is made of gold. (Default)
Still not the greatest I've ever been, but I'm coping, and am feeling way better than I was.

We got some blackout shades to put up in the bedroom windows, so I've been adjusting to having less light, and now I'm sleeping much more solidly. I still feel like I'll never have a normal sleep schedule again. We both have problems sleeping fairly often, and are both sort of at the mercy of the other person's sleeping schedule because of it, so progress is slow to make and quick to disappear. (I've tried melatonin and so forth, and it has never done a damned thing, so thanks, but no advice please.) I go to bed around eight in the morning and get up around four. It's messed.

It rained today, which kept me from going outside to work on engraving another skull. I started a wolf skull last week, and it's going well. I'm nervous about fucking it up, but I'm being very careful. I have no idea who I'll sell it to; it's going to be even more expensive than the dog and coyote skulls, and nobody's biting at those. They're high price-tag items, but there's no way around that math. I'd do nothing but inked skulls because those move, but I love doing the engraving. It really is incredible.

My dream, my ultimate goal, is to do a lion skull someday. To my anguish, there's one up on eBay right now for a crazy-low current bid. I'm a long way from being that proficient, though, and I certainly cannot afford it right now. I want to get at least a dozen skulls under my belt before I try to work on something that irreplaceable and powerful.

I might be able to swing mountain lion at some point, which would also be badass.

In other news, I am teaching myself Italian using some first-rate free audio lessons and a solid beginner's textbook I snagged for cheap. I'm sick of not learning anything new besides new art techniques, which is technically challenging but not so much intellectually. I am enjoying it immensely. I spoke pretty good Spanish at one time, and took third in state my senior year of high school. Gratifyingly, the similarity between the languages has given me a foundation to build on, so I'm finding it all very familiar so far. The particular way I think connects words' and sounds' similarities so quickly that learning a language pretty close to the one I already speak and very, very close to one I sort-of spoke at one time is often no different from acquiring new words in my own language. I have a knack, and probably could have been bilingual or multilingual if I'd been able to continue classes.

Proving that I can talk myself out of anything and make myself feel bad about anything, it is really bothering me that I am not learning Spanish because 1) Spanish is a language I might have a practical use for in my day to day life, given the high number of Spanish-speaking people here, and 2) learning something else feels like "wasting" all that grounding in Spanish. I am steadfastly ignoring this, and learning Italian for very silly reasons, and I kind of think that's a better reason -- wanting to just because it's fun and new and is making me happy.

We will see how long it takes me to get bored. My attentions can be dreadfully fickle, and with nobody to practice with/on, I'm pretty sure I'll get discouraged, but I'd like to pick up at least enough to be able to travel comfortably and swear fluently. I really really wanna see Italy someday, and I don't want to tour a country where I don't speak the language well enough to find a toilet, clean water, or medical care. Aside from practical considerations, it just seems rude.

Sadly, swearing isn't something that most sources teach, and while I can find some resources online (and pick up a lot of fun stuff from Assassin's Creed II and Brotherhood) what I will eventually need is a native speaker willing to teach me how to really go off.

Ugh. It's getting light outside, which should be against the fucking law. I'm going to go to bed. And when I wake up, grinding bones, language practice, and then MMF porn! Okay. So my life doesn't totally suck. The trick is remembering that.
naamah_darling: The right-side canines of a wolf's skull; the upper canine is made of gold. (Default)
Still not the greatest I've ever been, but I'm coping, and am feeling way better than I was.

We got some blackout shades to put up in the bedroom windows, so I've been adjusting to having less light, and now I'm sleeping much more solidly. I still feel like I'll never have a normal sleep schedule again. We both have problems sleeping fairly often, and are both sort of at the mercy of the other person's sleeping schedule because of it, so progress is slow to make and quick to disappear. (I've tried melatonin and so forth, and it has never done a damned thing, so thanks, but no advice please.) I go to bed around eight in the morning and get up around four. It's messed.

It rained today, which kept me from going outside to work on engraving another skull. I started a wolf skull last week, and it's going well. I'm nervous about fucking it up, but I'm being very careful. I have no idea who I'll sell it to; it's going to be even more expensive than the dog and coyote skulls, and nobody's biting at those. They're high price-tag items, but there's no way around that math. I'd do nothing but inked skulls because those move, but I love doing the engraving. It really is incredible.

My dream, my ultimate goal, is to do a lion skull someday. To my anguish, there's one up on eBay right now for a crazy-low current bid. I'm a long way from being that proficient, though, and I certainly cannot afford it right now. I want to get at least a dozen skulls under my belt before I try to work on something that irreplaceable and powerful.

I might be able to swing mountain lion at some point, which would also be badass.

In other news, I am teaching myself Italian using some first-rate free audio lessons and a solid beginner's textbook I snagged for cheap. I'm sick of not learning anything new besides new art techniques, which is technically challenging but not so much intellectually. I am enjoying it immensely. I spoke pretty good Spanish at one time, and took third in state my senior year of high school. Gratifyingly, the similarity between the languages has given me a foundation to build on, so I'm finding it all very familiar so far. The particular way I think connects words' and sounds' similarities so quickly that learning a language pretty close to the one I already speak and very, very close to one I sort-of spoke at one time is often no different from acquiring new words in my own language. I have a knack, and probably could have been bilingual or multilingual if I'd been able to continue classes.

Proving that I can talk myself out of anything and make myself feel bad about anything, it is really bothering me that I am not learning Spanish because 1) Spanish is a language I might have a practical use for in my day to day life, given the high number of Spanish-speaking people here, and 2) learning something else feels like "wasting" all that grounding in Spanish. I am steadfastly ignoring this, and learning Italian for very silly reasons, and I kind of think that's a better reason -- wanting to just because it's fun and new and is making me happy.

We will see how long it takes me to get bored. My attentions can be dreadfully fickle, and with nobody to practice with/on, I'm pretty sure I'll get discouraged, but I'd like to pick up at least enough to be able to travel comfortably and swear fluently. I really really wanna see Italy someday, and I don't want to tour a country where I don't speak the language well enough to find a toilet, clean water, or medical care. Aside from practical considerations, it just seems rude.

Sadly, swearing isn't something that most sources teach, and while I can find some resources online (and pick up a lot of fun stuff from Assassin's Creed II and Brotherhood) what I will eventually need is a native speaker willing to teach me how to really go off.

Ugh. It's getting light outside, which should be against the fucking law. I'm going to go to bed. And when I wake up, grinding bones, language practice, and then MMF porn! Okay. So my life doesn't totally suck. The trick is remembering that.
naamah_darling: The right-side canines of a wolf's skull; the upper canine is made of gold. (Warning: Death Ray)
Literally the most entertaining terrible porn I have ever read. This person's friend found a three-ring binder under a sink in the basement of her new house, and the contents are unbelievable. Do not read at work, or while eating or drinking, or at any time when howling with laughter might be considered rude or disruptive.

A sample, emphasis added, from the Arthurian tale "Reparations":


The day King Arthur discovered that his wife was having an affair with Sir Lancelot, the air was hot and humid, like the inside of a vagina. It was unusual weather, and it helped to sear the memory into his mind. He decided to demand recompense.

“Lancelot, old boy! I know what you’ve been doing with the Queen!” the King shouted across the tourney grounds, where Lancelot was practicing.

“My liege?” said Lancelot. From the practice, sweat was pooling on the tops of his ears, and dribbling down like cascades.

“Never mind apologies. I’ll forgive you in exchange for your rectum.”

Lancelot’s eyes widened like spinning tires. “Of course, sire,” he said. He stripped from his armor and leaned over the practice dummy with which he had been sparring. He was still sweaty from practice, and looked as though one of the castle’s maidservants had rubbed him down with cod liver oil. The King examined him appreciatively.

“Jolly good,” he said. He reached out to cup Lancelot’s scrotum, and swirled the testes like chi gong balls. “We’ll need to ease the passage, however.”

The King reached into his robes, and pulled out a potion. “This was given to me by the wizard Merlin,” he said. “He told me that I would need it someday. As ever, he was right; frighteningly useful chap, that Merlin.”

He looked down at the swollen globes of Lancelot’s ass, each as taut as a pregnant belly. The King slapped each one, as though to inspire the child inside to take its first breath. Lancelot moaned. The King reached into the potion bottle, and lathered its contents inside Lancelot’s anus. “I’ll reclaim my honor and we can be done with this mess, then,” said the King, and thrust his member through the sphincter.


It only gets better from there. The threesome with Guenevere ("Vera") is especially painful.

Amazing zoomable composite photo of the galactic center. Part of a three-part project. You can see the other parts from links at that page. Absolutely amazing.

An interesting article about creating secure, easy-to-remember passwords. Busts the myth that random-character impossible-to-remember passwords are secure. Very interesting reading.

Last, [livejournal.com profile] simplykimberly does kitten fostering. She's amazing, and posts the most adorable pictures of her babies. The latest crop is especially cute. She posts on [livejournal.com profile] splodefromcute from time to time, but I just found out she has an actual blog over at Kimberly's Kittens. Go check it out. Super, super adorable.
naamah_darling: The right-side canines of a wolf's skull; the upper canine is made of gold. (Warning: Death Ray)
Literally the most entertaining terrible porn I have ever read. This person's friend found a three-ring binder under a sink in the basement of her new house, and the contents are unbelievable. Do not read at work, or while eating or drinking, or at any time when howling with laughter might be considered rude or disruptive.

A sample, emphasis added, from the Arthurian tale "Reparations":


The day King Arthur discovered that his wife was having an affair with Sir Lancelot, the air was hot and humid, like the inside of a vagina. It was unusual weather, and it helped to sear the memory into his mind. He decided to demand recompense.

“Lancelot, old boy! I know what you’ve been doing with the Queen!” the King shouted across the tourney grounds, where Lancelot was practicing.

“My liege?” said Lancelot. From the practice, sweat was pooling on the tops of his ears, and dribbling down like cascades.

“Never mind apologies. I’ll forgive you in exchange for your rectum.”

Lancelot’s eyes widened like spinning tires. “Of course, sire,” he said. He stripped from his armor and leaned over the practice dummy with which he had been sparring. He was still sweaty from practice, and looked as though one of the castle’s maidservants had rubbed him down with cod liver oil. The King examined him appreciatively.

“Jolly good,” he said. He reached out to cup Lancelot’s scrotum, and swirled the testes like chi gong balls. “We’ll need to ease the passage, however.”

The King reached into his robes, and pulled out a potion. “This was given to me by the wizard Merlin,” he said. “He told me that I would need it someday. As ever, he was right; frighteningly useful chap, that Merlin.”

He looked down at the swollen globes of Lancelot’s ass, each as taut as a pregnant belly. The King slapped each one, as though to inspire the child inside to take its first breath. Lancelot moaned. The King reached into the potion bottle, and lathered its contents inside Lancelot’s anus. “I’ll reclaim my honor and we can be done with this mess, then,” said the King, and thrust his member through the sphincter.


It only gets better from there. The threesome with Guenevere ("Vera") is especially painful.

Amazing zoomable composite photo of the galactic center. Part of a three-part project. You can see the other parts from links at that page. Absolutely amazing.

An interesting article about creating secure, easy-to-remember passwords. Busts the myth that random-character impossible-to-remember passwords are secure. Very interesting reading.

Last, [livejournal.com profile] simplykimberly does kitten fostering. She's amazing, and posts the most adorable pictures of her babies. The latest crop is especially cute. She posts on [livejournal.com profile] splodefromcute from time to time, but I just found out she has an actual blog over at Kimberly's Kittens. Go check it out. Super, super adorable.
naamah_darling: The right-side canines of a wolf's skull; the upper canine is made of gold. (Cruel Intentions Asshole Day)
Briefly, this is the stupidest fucking article I've seen in . . . a very long time. I'm really having a hard time even mocking it, it's so pathetic:

Last supper 'has been super-sized', say obesity experts

The food portions depicted in paintings of the Last Supper have grown larger - in line with our own super-sizing of meals, say obesity experts.


. . .

Charlene Shoneye, an obesity dietician for the charity Weight Concern, said: "I'm really not surprised by these findings because the size of our plates and food portions has increased.

"Twenty years ago, for example, most crisps used to come in packs that were 20g. Now they are 30g, 50g or even 60g, and we are still eating the whole pack.

"This super-sizing has changed our perception of normal."

But she said it was not too late to reverse the trend and that individuals, society and the food industry should look to smaller portions.


OH NOES!

Just go read it. It's so stupid I can't even be angry with it. It's just so ludicrous and filled with fail.

To quote Sleep Talkin' Man, "Watching you think is like watching a cat shovel shit with two broken paws. Painful, but I just can't stop watching."

I'd mock it more thoroughly, but I'm very tired and my allergies are acting up and I really just want to go read a book. Hopefully some of the FA blogs will pick it up and run with it.

Anyway.

So the car thing is not as bad as we had thought. It's still totaled, but when we went to look at it in daylight, we discovered a note, and were able to contact the person who ran into it, who is fully insured. So, we will be getting something toward a new-to-us car. It remains to be seen how much. Still, welcome news.

I sat down tonight and brainstormed ideas for Adventurotica entries; I want to have a weekly feature on the website where I talk about something related to writing, or sex, or kink, or whatever. Something interesting. Assuming one a week, I have over a year's worth of ideas already. I feel pretty good about it.

Right. Off to find that book.
naamah_darling: The right-side canines of a wolf's skull; the upper canine is made of gold. (Cruel Intentions Asshole Day)
Briefly, this is the stupidest fucking article I've seen in . . . a very long time. I'm really having a hard time even mocking it, it's so pathetic:

Last supper 'has been super-sized', say obesity experts

The food portions depicted in paintings of the Last Supper have grown larger - in line with our own super-sizing of meals, say obesity experts.


. . .

Charlene Shoneye, an obesity dietician for the charity Weight Concern, said: "I'm really not surprised by these findings because the size of our plates and food portions has increased.

"Twenty years ago, for example, most crisps used to come in packs that were 20g. Now they are 30g, 50g or even 60g, and we are still eating the whole pack.

"This super-sizing has changed our perception of normal."

But she said it was not too late to reverse the trend and that individuals, society and the food industry should look to smaller portions.


OH NOES!

Just go read it. It's so stupid I can't even be angry with it. It's just so ludicrous and filled with fail.

To quote Sleep Talkin' Man, "Watching you think is like watching a cat shovel shit with two broken paws. Painful, but I just can't stop watching."

I'd mock it more thoroughly, but I'm very tired and my allergies are acting up and I really just want to go read a book. Hopefully some of the FA blogs will pick it up and run with it.

Anyway.

So the car thing is not as bad as we had thought. It's still totaled, but when we went to look at it in daylight, we discovered a note, and were able to contact the person who ran into it, who is fully insured. So, we will be getting something toward a new-to-us car. It remains to be seen how much. Still, welcome news.

I sat down tonight and brainstormed ideas for Adventurotica entries; I want to have a weekly feature on the website where I talk about something related to writing, or sex, or kink, or whatever. Something interesting. Assuming one a week, I have over a year's worth of ideas already. I feel pretty good about it.

Right. Off to find that book.

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