naamah_darling: Close cropped image of a blonde ponytailed man with a woman pulling a black stocking tightly around his neck. (BDSM)
[personal profile] naamah_darling
I try not to go this long without posting, but Livejournal is so quiet these days. Yes, I'm aware of the irony of complaining about that after not posting for 12 days.

I've felt pretty good, lately. Stable.

I have little energy, but my spirits have been good, and the panic attacks and general hovering anxiety have dissipated. They're barely clouds on the horizon, and only occasionally threaten. They'll come back, they always do, but it's better for right now.

The balance of meds is right. I'm learning to steer without yanking the controls. Small adjustments. Little things I can do. It doesn't put a roof on the anxiety or a floor on the depression, but it minimizes bouncing between the two, which is exhausting and demoralizing.

There are things to worry about, if I allow myself to worry, but I mostly try not to. They're things out of my control, or things I can affect, but I can only do so much at a time.

The cats are doing well, mostly. Fish and Sif are stressed from the boys wanting to play all the time, and because they are assholes, they play rough. I try to minimize this, but it's constant. And frustrating. They had their second aderpshun day early this month, and they still act like kittens. Smooch because he has atrocious impulse control issues, and Etrigan because he's too stupid to mature past that extremely stupid kitten phase. They are both full of love and intermittently very, very smelly.

I can't remember if I posted about it here, or just briefly on Facebook, and I am too lazy to go look, but several weeks ago, Sargon lifted Etrigan off the back of a chair I was sitting in, and the little asshole tensed up and accidentally vented his anal glands on the back of my head.

The stench was horrific and RIGHT NEXT TO MY HEAD. All of my clothes had to go into the washer without touching the floor or any other furniture, and I was making incoherent and completely involuntary gargling noises the whole time. It was briefly worse when I got in the shower, because the hot water basically turned it into one of those scent-diffuser things, and the entire bathroom was bathed in the lovely aroma of cat musk. It was an awful lot like being inside Satan's sweaty butthole. I had to shampoo twice with a vinegar rinse before each one to break the stink down. My hair was really soft afterwards, at least.

It was, of course, fucking hilarious, and since it didn't get on the chair, no real harm was done. I can smell again, and everything.

Shit-For-Brains, though, is getting his ass-pimples popped next time I take him to the vet, because, while there is nothing wrong with him that is making him do this -- his anal glands are not impacted or anything like that, and the stuff that comes out looks and smells normal for cat musk . . . some cats just do this more often than other cats -- I'm just tired of him doing it, because he manages to butt-stink on something about once every three or four months, and someday it's going to get on something I cannot wash and could not replace. And that stuff is powerful.

Luckily, the Banfield we take him to has a vet tech there known as Anal Gland Girl. How's that for a superhero name? Apparently she's good at it, and doesn't mind being ASSigned the chore.

And on that note, I believe I shall leave you.

For god's sake, ask some questions or provide me with things you want to hear me blither on about, because I miss the interaction, but my brain has simply not been equal to the task of deciding how to fill the silence.

Date: 2013-07-29 04:50 am (UTC)
quartzpebble: (Default)
From: [personal profile] quartzpebble
eww eww eww ick.

Link roundups would be cool. More pony stuff would be cool. Gaming is entertaining to read, but I don't generally have much to say about it. Asshole cat posts are hilarious.

Date: 2013-07-29 05:15 pm (UTC)
stormerider: (Default)
From: [personal profile] stormerider
Did you have a chance to look at Scrivener? Curious to see what you thought about it.

Date: 2013-07-29 06:14 pm (UTC)
rikibeth: (Default)
From: [personal profile] rikibeth
Oh, lord, I miss the interaction too.

The interaction I have to CONCENTRATE on is promo stuff for my book (omg my book) - I've already got six appearances in the can, but now I have to set up the posts on MY blog where I'm giving guest spots to other authors (hey, reciprocal, and hey, content!) and it's all a little scattered in threaded email exchanges and while I've got them sorted into a folder, it's still HAAAARD.

I know you read my book at the manuscript stage. Do you want me to ask my publisher to send you an official review copy? Because I would be thrilled if you'd be willing to write a review. Or even put up my promo stuff with a little note that said "I got to read the manuscript, I liked it, check it out." Because, quiet or not, you have a TON of LJ followers...

also I think you said you were ordering a copy, and if it's a print copy, tell me and I'll send you a signed bookplate for it. If I can get the things to PRINT OUT PROPERLY.

Auuugh I need to mess with the printer and the kitchen is overflowing with dishes (how does this happen when I don't even eat regularly?) and all I want to do is sit here and re-read something tasty, like maybe The Oracle Glass. Which I missed the one-day Kindle sale on it, dammit. Yes, I have a gorgeous hardcover copy. It'd still be nice to carry a copy everywhere in my pocket.

Oh person wise in the ways of formatting stories for e-books, tell me this: is it even possible to control the font, and have readers see it on their devices? My Kindle app has a setting called Publisher Font so I assume so, but it doesn't seem to change how any of my books look.

And I am a big huge nerd about typefaces and I don't know what my publisher uses for e-book or for print and while there is nothing wrong with Times New Roman (it's so ordinary it's not perceptible, which means people focus on the content) part of me wants something a little more unusual, one from the Old-Style family like Garamond or Palatino (well, Aldus the bookface version, but one of THOSE). To contribute to the period feel of the book, dontchaknow.

AUGH tell me it's all gonna be OK.

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Date: 2013-08-07 11:33 am (UTC)
arkady: Close-up of self with red hair. (Default)
From: [personal profile] arkady
I've had 8 cats in my life, of whom 2 were female, the rest male. I've never had a male cat vent his anal glands - either accidentally or on purpose; at least, not in the house! after reading this, I think I've had a lucky escape!

Date: 2013-07-29 02:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dulcimeoww.livejournal.com
My cat once did that on the bed right next to my head when I woke up. It was unimaginably awful.

I'm glad you're in a level space, even if it is also a quiet one.

Date: 2013-07-29 05:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] naamah-darling.livejournal.com
Oh, lord, about six months ago, Asshole did it on the pillow right next to me when I scritched him really vigorously on the butt.

Not making THAT mistake again. I'm lucky I got the pillowcases off in time. He got it on the WALL that time. D:

It's not his fault, so I forgive him every time, and it's mostly hilarious, but dear god, the smell is atrocious.

Date: 2013-07-29 02:26 am (UTC)
platypus: (tay)
From: [personal profile] platypus
Toeffe used to reguarly get anal gland gunk (what we here call "assfunk") on stuff. Once he was in the front hall and I swear to god I heard an audible squeak and he had, like, projectile assfunked. I was never so glad for tile in my life. The smell, it is like nothing in the world. And my husband retches if he's in the same room with it, so it falls to me to clean it up. Ugh.

Date: 2013-07-29 05:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] naamah-darling.livejournal.com
I swear to god I heard an audible squeak and he had, like, projectile assfunked.

Oh dear god. I am laughing so hard, but oh dear god, no. Oh god.

Date: 2013-07-29 02:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] theoldone.livejournal.com
I'm glad you got over the marking . . . I do notice when you don't post here, because FB just ain't the same.

Date: 2013-07-29 05:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] naamah-darling.livejournal.com
I was alternately laughing and yowling with disgust at the time, so it wasn't that bad. The smell was just . . . god, the hot water and the ass-scented steam . . . that was a special brand of awful right there. If it had occurred to me, I would have taken a cold shower. Won't make that mistake again.

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Date: 2013-07-29 02:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] diatryma.livejournal.com
I really, really hope I never experience anything having to do with anal glands. A friend of mine has a dog whose ass explodes periodically; something is wrong there, wrong enough that she may rehome the dog someday so she can live happily outside where her permanently leaking ass glands will harm none but the wildlife.

Ponies in the mail tomorrow. I vastly overestimated the pony turnover rate, so it's just the ones I mentioned.

Date: 2013-07-29 03:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] onered911.livejournal.com
I work in a vet clinic and chronic anal gland issues are usually a symptom of a food allergy. If she has bad ears, too, it's almost assured that's the problem. Your friend should put her dog on a limited ingredient or hypoallergenic diet for a while and see if that helps with the problem. Hopefully this helps your friend keep her dog!

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Date: 2013-07-29 03:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cattraine.livejournal.com
"Anal Gland Girl"...that's a pretty atrocious superpower to have. LOL

Date: 2013-07-29 04:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] diatryma.livejournal.com
I think it would be awesome. Most superheroes are fungible-- Superman, Wonder Woman, Spider-Man, they all save the day. But when you need Anal Gland Girl, you need Anal Gland Girl. Wolverine isn't going to help.

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Date: 2013-07-29 03:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] onered911.livejournal.com
I'm sort of the Anal Gland Girl at my clinic and I've been glanded on a few times...I feel your pain! Chronic anal gland issues (if it's chunky, thick, or even just granular then there's something out of whack) is usually a side effect of a food allergy. If it gets any worse a diet change may be needed. Here's hoping it's just him being an asshole and not an allergy. Also that he calms down on the shooting anal glands!! XD

Date: 2013-07-29 04:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] naamah-darling.livejournal.com
It's always been . . . healthy-looking. Clear faintly tannish stuff. Doesn't leak or seep, or smell putrid (just like ass-musk, which is its own smell). I've seen enough ass-musk that WASN'T gross(er than it usually is) to know that's generally healthy buttstink. He doesn't drag his butt, or over-groom, or anything like that. I watch him for it. His poops are healthy. He's not an excessive puker. No skin problems. So allergy is possible (we know he has regular allergies, hence his allergy-related asthma) but if he does have one, there are no other signs.

He only does it when he tenses his butt up SUPER-SUDDENLY, but because he's a twitchy, pounce-prone little DICKHOLE, and because despite my better judgment I persist in affectionately cat-paddling his flanks while he purrs madly, this HAPPENS sometimes.

I watch so carefully, because I've seen cats with impacted or abscessed anal glands that I just don't want that to ever happen to him. Frankly, every time he does it, I poke and prod a little to make sure he's not sore (I'm going into full decontamination ANYWAY, so why NOT gently poke him in the bum?) but he never is. I do want to ask the vet about it next time just to be sure because this is like the third/fourth time in a year he's done it . . . I had another cat who did this all the time (also black, also skinny) and never had trouble with his bottom, but I love Etrigan so much and fuck it, the office visits are free.

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Date: 2013-07-29 04:23 am (UTC)
ext_29704: (Default)
From: [identity profile] petranef.livejournal.com
Get you some latex gloves and some KY and you can be all pro-active on the anal gland issue...... :)

Date: 2013-07-29 04:26 am (UTC)
starwatcher: (Windmill # 5)
From: [personal profile] starwatcher
.
Many years ago, my brother introduced me to the Skunk Cure. It was developed by a chemist, and it really works; I had a dog that got skunked twice a summer, and this recipe took away the smell easily and quickly. It might be worth a try when dealing with anal-gland scent.

Three things: do NOT mix it and save it; just keep hydrogen peroxide and baking soda on hand. And if you need more, I'd double the recipe, not dilute it with water. And after rinsing out the recipe, I always did a second wash with regular shampoo; it seemed to leave the hair more natural feeling.

Good luck with solving his stinky problem.
.

Date: 2013-07-29 05:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] naamah-darling.livejournal.com
Yeah, H2O2 RAPIDLY degenerates into its component stuffs. You can't keep it out or mixed with anything.

And YES! More people need to know about the peroxide/baking soda! That is almost exactly the Mythbusters formula that they tested against every other commercial and traditional skunk cure, and found that it was literally THE BEST. The only thing that killed the smell completely.

It actually occurred to me to use it, since I'm sure the composition of cat musk and skunk musk must be similar -- I know they share some of the same aromatic components -- but I was out of peroxide, sadly. So I went to the other miracle worker: vinegar. Worked like a charm, I just had to do it twice so I didn't miss any spots because OH MY GOD, that stuff CLINGS.

Date: 2013-07-29 04:50 am (UTC)
ashbet: (Bastian 1)
From: [personal profile] ashbet
I sincerely hope, for her sake, that Anal Gland Girl was born with a congenital inability to SMELL ANYTHING, EVER. o__O

When Bastian was younger, he had POWERFUL ASS-FUNK, and he washed himself a lot . . .

. . . and you KNOW how affectionate he is. And how he likes to curl up around my neck. And be next to my FACE.

With his ASS-BREATH and ASS-MUZZLE.

*twitch, twitch*

I am so, so, so glad that he finally outgrew the issue, and that it only crops up when he's under stress, which is one reason why I kind of doubt that we'll be cat-fostering again anytime soon . . . because, OMG. THE STENCH OF IT.

Also, you have greatly amused my child because of the uncontrollable-laughing-with-horror response I made to this post -- she said that the noises I made were alarming and hilarious. So I told her to come over and read it, to share the pain love ;)

* * *

So glad to hear that the meds are helping, and that you can make minor course corrections without oversteering. Just so, so happy for you that you're in a better place.

Much much love to you and Sargon <3<3<3

Date: 2013-07-29 06:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] naamah-darling.livejournal.com
I pig-snort laughed at ASS BREATH and ASS MUZZLE. Because that is really disgusting. I mean, REALLY. That is GROSS. And knowing it is musk, which is far less filthy than actual poop, doesn't make it stink any less horrendously.

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Date: 2013-07-29 04:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dark-phoenix54.livejournal.com
Bleeaarrrrrgggghhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!

I think- nay, I KNOW- I would puke if that happened to me. I found it bad enough to be in the room when the vet squeezed a cat's anal glands. You have a stronger stomach than I do.

Glad to hear you've reached an equilibrium!

Date: 2013-07-29 06:26 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] naamah-darling.livejournal.com
It wasn't a gag-inducing smell for me, thankfully. I think it's less that I have a strong stomach and more that musk smells don't really bother me, even if they are very strong and . . . I believe the perfumer's term is "fecal." Uuuuuugh. It WAS still vile.

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Date: 2013-07-29 12:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thediva-laments.livejournal.com
My dear departed Smoky was seriously bad with his startle response and would empty his glands constantly when he was a kitten/young cat/young adult. We're talking a couple times a month. He hit my computer, me, the bed, clothing, all kinds of stuff. I discovered that the way to train him out of the instinct to just freak out was to grab him and put his rear into the sink and then run warm water over his ass for a couple minutes. He loved the sink and the bathtub but never liked the water unless it was dripping and he could drink it. Warm water on his ass was WAY not up there on his list of shit to do.

But, after a couple of months of doing this he began to associate blowing his glands with getting his ass wet and he stopped doing it. He live to be 12 years old and never blew his glads just because someone moved too quickly or he didn't notice a hand coming before it touched him. I don't know if it works for all cats, but it saved me.

Date: 2013-07-29 03:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] journalfag.livejournal.com
My very first job at the vet clinic was expressing the impacted, infected anal glands of a cat.

Date: 2013-07-29 07:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] drumlogic.livejournal.com
You definitely win funniest journal entry title!! That almost made me spit out my tea!

Date: 2013-07-29 10:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] datalore.livejournal.com
I really wish I didn't have as much experience with anal glands as I have. Our dear departed dog had to be sedated to have them cleaned out the first time, at least they hadn't burst. The vet begged us to let her show us how to empty the anal glands at home. It involved putting a finger in the dog's butt and finding the little grape-sized gland. We did do it at home after that, but I still wonder what the hell our dog thought we were doing.

Then our older cat started having issues with her anal glands, and let me tell you, we are PAYING for the VET'S OFFICE to empty them. Not only does our cat object a lot more, we have to sleep sometime, and at least we can keep our plausible deniability. "Oh poor girl, WHAT did they do to you in that back room? That's horrible! Here, we'll take you home where it's safe."

I do have to specify that I'd like her cleaned off after they squeeze the glands though. Yes, she's upset, but I'll be more upset if her anal gland squeezings are tracked into the carrier and then all over the house.

Date: 2013-07-30 01:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ladybugpurple.livejournal.com
I THINK you may have mentioned it at dinner? I can't remember. *LOL* I'm glad you could get the smell out!

I should have my money pretty soon, so I'll PM you via FB to let you know when I do so if you're still up for me coming over! :)

Date: 2013-07-30 07:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] arielstarshadow.livejournal.com
Everyone in the office thinks I'm insane, because I just started laughing hysterically for no apparent reason.

Date: 2013-07-31 02:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] snowcoma.livejournal.com
For god's sake, ask some questions or provide me with things you want to hear me blither on about, because I miss the interaction, but my brain has simply not been equal to the task of deciding how to fill the silence.

Y'know, it's been more than a year since we had a deep, meaningful conversation about werewolf cock.

Date: 2013-07-31 04:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] naamah-darling.livejournal.com
And it's been about a month since I got my werewolf dildo.

Hmmmmmm.

I'm making a box to keep it in, so there will EVENTUALLY be pictures of the box at least! :D

Date: 2013-07-31 07:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tainry.livejournal.com
Yay for balance! <3

I am also Anal Gland Queen at my hospital. \o/ I have the thinnest fingers, for one thing. Not that the cats and chihuahuas are especially grateful. Rarely does a day go by that I do not at some point have a finger up a dog's ass. It's oddly satisfying, like squeezing an enormous pimple. We have a Great Dane who comes in with enormously full ones every few weeks - size of kiwi fruit I shit you not. It's like Lake Anal Juice when we're done there. We've also had the projectiles (I had to mop the cupboards), and ones with sound effects - gplurk! pglurk! Toothpaste worms are the best!

Date: 2013-07-31 07:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] naamah-darling.livejournal.com
AHAHAHAHA!!! EWWWWWW.

How the FUCK, with the KIWI FRUIT SIZED ANAL GLANDS. I mean . . . do you catch it in a hazmat bucket? Towels? I just . . . I am having trouble even picturing containment procedures for such a thing. O_O

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Date: 2013-08-01 05:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] txgecko.livejournal.com
On another totally different topic, this song reminds me of you.

Howl : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0SLoOzTMjC8

Date: 2013-08-01 06:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] naamah-darling.livejournal.com
AHAHA! How did you know? I LOVE that song. The lyrics are amazing.

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Date: 2013-08-06 08:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cissa.livejournal.com
Our dog seems to need her anal glands "expressed" because she is exceedingly stinky and does not appear to have rolled in anything. We're taking her to the vet, because I am quite sure this would be another thing at which she'll SCREAM as it's being done, like a chick in a horror flick.

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